Breaking Free: How to Overcome the Effects of Child Abuse

The Promise of Healing

The best part of breaking free from the effects of child abuse, is healing. Healing happens when hope tells us there is something better to come. And even when you or a victim you know are in the midst of suffering, and cannot fathom how you will heal, there are those of us who have healed and encourage you to reach toward a better life.  Healing is not forgetting what happened. I discovered that healing is the process of mending the injuries incurred and transforming into a stronger, healthier person who thrives in life and hopefully helps others experiencing similar crises. How do you break free then, from the lingering negative effects attached to the injuries caused from crimes committed by what is described as power based violence. I started my healing journey by acknowledging the truth of what happened to me then I considered three questions that, at first, I was uncertain I had the answers to.

The Journey Begins: Addressing Power-Based Violence

Once I acknowledged the truth about the violent crimes that happened to me when I was a child and was confident that the memories weren’t just bad dreams or pieced together segments of various crime movies or talk shows I’d watched through the years, I asked myself, “Will I find someone who believes me?” “Do I want to heal completely?” and “Is healing within my reach?” “Yes.” I answered, with confidence, to all three questions. Wanting to heal and believing I could, pivoted me in a direction where I faced forward and looked ahead at a future where I could live freed from past pain. Hope gave me the momentum to take the next step; addressing each and every one of the negative effects and festering injuries that still lingered from the violent crimes of abuse. I interpreted hope as the key that unlocked multiple locks that freed me from a prison of secrets and fear driven silence.

Understanding Unique Experiences

Every victim of power based violence, no matter what their age, and the circumstances surrounding the cruelty they experienced is unique to the individual. At the same time, many victims share similar effects and consequences. Darkness to Light, is an organization that offers abundant resources to child victims and their families. They educate and encourage the healing process as well as provide prevention strategies to stop abuse.  On their website they address the effects of power based violence in this article. My hope is that in your search to heal, you will overcome your fear, be encouraged,  and find a way forward to experience what it’s like to break free from the effects of abuse.’

The Support Network: You Are Not Alone

Breaking free from the effects of abuse wasn’t easy for me. But I didn’t have to do it alone, which in turn helped me to persevere. I found a caring counselor. I intentionally reserved time with family and friends who encouraged me while in the midst of the ugly crisis. I sought help where I felt safe, became educated, acquired coping skills, and continued to explore how my faith in a loving God gave me an inner strength and peace that shaped my life into something  I didn’t expect; A wonderful and beautiful life worth living.

Confronting Internal Barriers

Why then was it difficult to break free from the residual pains of the past? Shame that the abuse was somehow my fault or a form of punishment that I did something to deserve it. Fear of the unknown. Doubt that I couldn’t cope as I uncovered forgotten details and the suffering attached to those details. Fear of what I knew: the sounds, tastes, smells, touch, and sight, within the atmosphere of the abusive act and wanting to avoid remembering. Because I couldn’t see into the future and know for certain when I reached full healing status, I oftentimes doubted if I would fully recover. And then I discovered I had a choice and was equipped with all the power I needed to make that choice; “ I don’t have to fall prey to hopelessness, doubt, and fear. I choose to hope that I will fully mend from the injuries of abuse.” And I did. This is when I felt one lock at a time fall away as I began to break free from the pains of my past.

The Path to Freedom

Breaking free from the negative effects child abuse causes, was something I had the privilege to experience. My hope for you and any one you know and care about that is suffering from childhood trauma, including but not limited to sexual abuse, is that you will break free too. Breaking free meant weaving together safe people who cared about me, acting on hope, faith, courage, determination, and perseverance. And as I unlocked one lock at a time, I revisited most of the ugly and painful details without injury. Those memories were available for me to take hold of, acknowledge, respond to, and give over to God, who holds a higher authority to judge the wrongs against me and the perpetrators who inflicted their cruelty on me. I broke free and I didn’t have to do it alone. There are no more locks on the prison that confined me to the past. I’m free.

A Message of Hope and Urgency

Do you find yourself or someone you know, in the middle of a crisis circumstance that you cannot escape or turn back from? No matter how intently you wish, hope, and pray to be extracted from the situation, or how much effort you exude to deny it, make it go away, minimize it, or even pretend it isn’t happening. But it is happening or it did happen. Does the crisis imprison you with uncertainty, confusion, doubt, pain, and fear?. Get help.

Additional Support and Encouragement

You may find encouragement in this YouTube message on hope.