The Silent Victim: Early Childhood Trauma and Crimes Against Children
Crime is a complex beast. It generates a destructive power that expands beyond its victims. The atmosphere created around a crime is bound by many layers. Most difficult are the layers we don’t see that hold the intrusive details of traumatic events inside the memory of the victims. Uncovering those details requires extensive time, money, and the efforts of many, in order for justice to be realized; that is to stop the perpetrator and to rescue and heal the victim. And when the victim is a child, revisiting those frightening memories of the trauma, are oftentimes kept repressed in the deeper layers somewhere within their soul.
Abuses Impact: Beyond the Victim
The effects of crimes against children grow and extend beyond the immediate victim. Perpetrators, law enforcement, witnesses, family, friends, medical personnel, counselors, social services, investigative journalists, and attorneys become part of the response that envelopes the trauma caused by the crime. This dynamic in itself can feel overwhelming for the victims and their families, sometimes causing them to retreat into silence.
I was a victim of a violent crime during childhood. I struggled to be heard and it took years before I was rescued and the perpetrator arrested. I was afraid I would lose my family or they would be harmed, or I would be further harmed, if I persisted in telling how Ivan, the serial predator, hurt me. I remained silent until I realized this monster who lived in my community did not intend to stop, when I said,”no.”
An Alarming Reality: A UNICEF Perspective
The statistics are more than just numbers - they warn us that this is an ongoing problem. Violence against children is not just persistent; it is growing. From a worldwide perspective this CDC statement released on March 14, 2024 states, “Violence against children and youth is common. An estimated 1 billion children—half of all the children in the world—are victims of violence every year.
The UNICEF report uncovers a global epidemic hidden in plain sight. Some forms of violence are so deeply ingrained in societal structures that they're tacitly accepted or go unrecognized. Many victims are too young or too vulnerable to speak out, trapped in a silence enforced by fear, manipulation, and systemic neglect. Even when they find the courage to speak, the legal system often fails them, and child protection services remain frustratingly absent.
All of these obstacles may sound discouraging. Keep reaching for help. Don’t stay silent. I found that this journey takes effort and is worth the joy and contentment found in life as healing happens. At the time I went to the police, the statute of limitations had expired. I was overwhelmed with discouragement at first. With the help of my therapist and my husband, we explored other options. We found a way to address the crimes that happened to me when I was a child. It took courage, wisdom, and a legal and safe approach that I share in my memoir, Alligator in the Ocean.
My own story is a testament to the complexity of surviving childhood trauma and breaking the silence. Although complex, I survived and found a loud voice to help stop the crimes and a way to heal from the injuries incurred.
My Personal Journey: Breaking the Silence
Being heard as a child victim is difficult. It took me many months after the crimes occurred, before I told someone I trusted. At first, I stayed silent because it involved a terror I kept inside of me, associated with the crimes. I was afraid for my life, and didn’t know how to break through the fear that silenced me.
I was afraid of - not just what happened, but will it happen again? And who will rescue me? Who will protect me? Where will my help come from?
The Struggle to Be Believed
Communication becomes a difficult task when trauma has crushed your voice. "It hurts here," was all I could manage - a simple phrase that carried the weight of unspeakable pain. I said it, outloud. It was a start to stopping Ivan. However, when I spoke, I was silenced. The abuser, his crimes, my injuries - all hidden in plain sight. This is the insidious nature of child abuse.
Escalation and Survival
Breaking the silence is not a single act of courage, but a battle that I fought with perseverance and hope. I tried three times to reveal the truth about Ivan and what he did. The first time, the person I told and trusted, in turn, confronted Ivan. He denied everything. I was left to protect myself from the human monster that lived in my community. Until I found a way to break the silence. I searched until I found someone who listened.
Finding Strength Beyond Silence
Healing is not about erasing the memories, but addressing them when they challenge you on multiple levels; physical, emotional, and spiritual. Years passed, after the crimes occurred, when I acknowledged fear that I couldn’t explain, tormented me from within. Pieces of my past haunted me with details I had no words to describe. I became desperate to get help and get rid of the torment.
It took time to find the counselor who best fit my needs, who patiently helped me find my voice. And also, I accepted my life changed as I once knew it. I lived differently than what I once knew as, “normal”, while I addressed the challenges from my past. What remained constant was my faith that God was greater than the hardship I experienced and He would be the strength above and beyond my own. It empowered me not to give up on myself, my family, and the other victims.
Eventually, Ivan was arrested. I write about my journey of survival and how my family and I participated in Ivan’s arrest in my memoir, Alligator in the Ocean.
A Call to Action
Child victims of crime are always injured by the abuse inflicted on them. And based on my experience the injuries have the potential to reach multiple levels; physical, mental, and spiritual. How then, can we find these predators that hide in our communities to prey on children? How can we help the children who are being abused? It takes courage to make a call (https://www.alligatorintheocean.com/resources) to the proper authorities. That call is worth rescuing a child who is suffering from abuse, and in turn help provide them a chance to be free from the pain to heal, and thrive in life.
You Are Not Alone
Are you a victim or a friend or family of a victim? You are not alone. There is hope and help is within reach. I hope you will lift your arms out of the jaws of the complex beast that entraps you; the hidden injuries caused from abuse and take a brave leap to get help. My hope is you will rise above the storm and that you will find rest as you heal and a better life ahead.
Additional Resources:
This podcast by Proverbs 31, ministries may encourage you to move forward through healing and away from the damaging consequences resulting from the trauma that is unique to your own experiences.
Seek professional help immediately if you or someone you know is being harmed. And/or Call 911.
Go to my resource page for suggested contact information, HELP
Be brave. Be wise. Be safe.
This blog is for informational purposes only. Anina Swan LLC Blog makes no warranties, expressed, implied or statutory as to the information in this document.
Be brave. Be wise. Be safe.
Seek professional help immediately if you or someone you know is being harmed. And/or Call 911.
Go to my resource page for suggested contact information, HELP
This paper is for informational purposes only. Anina Swan LLC Blog makes no warranties, expressed, implied or statutory as to the information in this document.